The Blue Phoenix
by PhantomShadow1115
Summary: Kuroko has been MIA since his 1st year of high school. His friends searched high and low for him, but eventually gave up. Two years later, what happens when the Shadow returns, the weight of his horrifying crimes of his new life on his shoulders? (Originally from Wattpad as PhantomShadow1115). (All errors fixed, enjoy!)
1. It's Been A While

**Kise P.O.V.**

Kise was just taking a walk in the park. He had on a white V-neck, dark grey-blue skinny jeans, and golden-brown shades. He sipped coffee from a nearby cafe. He was just supposed to be taking a small break today. After all, today was _the_ day. The day Kuroko disappeared. Kise sighed. His high school life was not supposed to go like this. Kise was supposed to keep on challenging Kuroko and Kagami forever.

Kise was supposed to be able to keep fighting against Seirin, Rakuzan, Yosen, Shuutoku, and Too. Kise was supposed to keep playing with Kaijou. He wasn't supposed to quit basketball because it was so painful. He wasn't supposed to move to America because he couldn't look at Japan without feeling like his chest was being crushed by an elephant. None of this was supposed to happen.

But it did. Kise shook his head. Kise knew that Kuroko would have fought with everything he had to get home. Kuroko was not coming home.

"Ah, Akashicchi would kill me if he knew how much I keep thinking of Kurokocchi." Kise whispered to himself, "Akashicchi would not want me to keep dwelling on the past." Kise smirked to himself at the thought of his old captain. Kise sat down at a bench. He finished his coffee and threw away the cup.

**"Um..."** a stranger's voice said in English, **"Can you give me directions to the nearest airport?"** Kise looked at the young man sitting next to him. He wore a black long-sleeve hoodie and navy skinny jeans. There seemed to be a T-shirt underneath the jacket that was the same color as his hair. There was white Beats headphones hanging around the man's neck. The man seemed about as tall as Kise, but much skinnier. His face was long with sharp features.

The man's eyes were a deep azure, like looking down into the ocean with sunlight streaming in, and being unable to see the ocean floor, and his eyes were slanted and tilted upwards toward the end. The man had light blue hair, like a faint wisp of cloud on a clear summer day, thought much of it was covered by the hoodie. Then Kise realized that the man had suddenly appeared out of nowhere and that Kise had just been sitting alone a moment ago.

"KYAA!" Kise shouted jumping upwards and away from the bench. The man sighed as if he had been treated like that many times before.

**"A-ah, sorry."** Kise said sheepishly. Then he realized that the man must have a low presence like Kuroko. Kise knew who annoyed Kuroko would get when people didn't notice him, **"Say, you must have a low presence, huh?"** The man tilted his head at Kise.

**"A low presence? I guess that's one way to explain it."** the man nodded, **"But yes. How did you know?"**

**"I-I had a... friend who is like you."** Kise stuttered and sighed at the thought of Kuroko, **"He always did that to me, and just to tease me, too."** Kise couldn't help but smile at the memories. Such good memories they were.

**"Oh, really?"** the man laughed, **"Damn, sometimes I do that, too!"** Kise smiled. He liked this man. Kise found the man open and really forgiving, especially when Kise had been so rude to him.

**"I'm Ryōta Kise, by the way. You asked for directions, right?"** Kise sat back down and pulled out his phone. He opened up a digital map of the area, **"Here we go, see you..."** and Kise showed the man how to get to the airport.

**"Thank you!"** the man graciously thanked Kise, **"Ah, but I'm so rude! My name's Tetsuya Kuroko, thank you for your help."** Kise felt like he'd been struck in the face with a pan. TETSUYA KUROKO?! As in the Kuroko Tetsuya that had suddenly vanished from Kise's life a couple years ago?

"K-Kuroko Tetsuya?" Kise stuttered, not even realized that he was speaking in Japanese, "As in, _my dead friend from middle school _Kuroko Tetsuya?" Kuroko blinked at Kise with much surprise.

"Uh, maybe? But I don't think I'm dead..." Kuroko seemed caught off guard that someone who could speak English so fluently could speak Japanese so well as well, but that was just Kise's assumption. It was hard enough to see what he was so surprised about. Kise couldn't reply, as his throat had constricted. All that came out was a small strangled noise.

Could it be? Could Kise have finally, finally found him?

"Why are you going to the airport?" Kise asked. Where was Kuroko going now?

"Ah... well... I'm going back to Japan, you see..." He trailed off. Probably because Kise was shooting off rainbows and stars.

"I'm going back to Japan later this week!" Kise said excitedly, "Do you think you could meet me at Maji's? I want to talk to you about where you've been!" Kuroko tilted his head at Kise.

"Maji's?" Kuroko echoed, "Was that... somewhere we went to a lot?"

"..." Kise couldn't form words. How did Kuroko not remember? Some of the GoM's most memorable moments had taken place there! What was wrong with Kuroko

"Ah, sorry, I probably should have explained, huh?" Kuroko grinned sheepishly and chuckled, "Sorry, when I was 15, I got in a plane crash when I was flying to America from Japan. This accident led me to have permanent amnesia. I've been living in America ever since." This explanation was very monotone and robotic, leading Kise to believe that he had said that many times before.

"Amnesia?" Kise echoed dumbly, "Oh, _that's _why you never came home."

"Hai." Kuroko nodded, but he still looked a bit troubled, "Home... meaning I knew you personally?"

"Hai!" Kise grinned at Kuroko, "We were close friends in middle school, and we had fight, starting in the middle of our third year, but we got over it!" Kise sighed. He _could_ have said they were best friends, but now Kise didn't want a close friendship with Kuroko, he wanted their _old_ chemistry.

"Really? Wow, was I a dramatic child?" Kuroko asked sincerely, "My grandmother says that I am to expressive." Kise couldn't hold in his laughter.

"You? Expressive?" Kise couldn't believe his ears, "You were the most deadpan, monotonous person I have ever met. If you had heard your best friend suddenly started cross-dressing, you wouldn't even bat an eye!" Kuroko's eyes widened.

"Are you sure you're not exaggerating?" Kuroko asked dryly, "That sounds like... really hard." Kise smiled.

"Yeah, it probably was. But all for basketball." Kise shrugged, "I mean, you loved the sport so much, and it isn't like you're sacrificing much, so you kept up the facade."

"I play basketball?" Kuroko tilted his chin and looked skyward pensively, "And why would I stay so emotionless?"

"No! No!" Kise cried out, a bit ashamed of himself because he didn't do a good job explaining, "I mean, yes, you played basketball, but you weren't emotionless, you just didn't show it! And it was to help you make your low presence a weapon, and to help with your misdirection!"

"Oh! You mean that magic-trick-thing?" Kuroko smiled, "I can see how a low presence, coupled with misdirection would be a fearsome weapon."

"Hai!" Kise thanked Kami-sama that Kuroko understood. How embarrassing would it be for Kuroko if he got the wrong idea? Especially in front of the GoM or Seirin? He was sure to run into one of them, so if Kuroko didn't quite grasp the concept and talked to his old friends, it was going to a disaster. And Kise would be in so much trouble...

"Ah, arigato gozaimasu, Kise-kun." Kuroko offered a small bow.

"Of course, Kurokocchi!" Kise grinned, "But remember to meet me at the Maji's in Tokyo on the 21st, m'kay? I'll be there by eleven!" Kuroko smiled and waved as he walked away towards the airport. Kise watched Kuroko's retreating form. When Kuroko walked out of earshot, Kise pulled out his phone and instantly called Akashi.

"Ryōta." Akashi greeted from the other side, "Why have you suddenly called?" Kise could barely contain his glee.

"Akashicchi!" Kise whisper-yelled, "Guess who I found!" Akashi sighed. While he had missed the blonde, Akashi had been in no rush to deal with Kise's hyper-ness. Only Kuroko had had the patience to handle Kise. Though it was good to hear that Kise was feeling fairly cheerful today, of all days.

"How am I supposed to know, Ryōta?" Akashi sighed, "And you haven't answered my question."

"Kurokocchi, Akashicchi! Kurokocchi!" Kise said happily. Akashi sucked in a harsh breath and stiffened at the mention of Kuroko.

"What about him?" Akashi's voice came out colder and harsher than he'd meant it to. Luckily, it was Kise, so Kise didn't mind. Much. Does ice-cold shivers down your spine count as "much"?

"That's who I found!" At Kise's words, Akashi's mind went blank, "I found Kurokocchi in America! But he got amnesia. I don't know the full story, just that now he's going to Japan again. He's going to meet me at Maji's on the 21st, sometime around eleven, so bring everyone there!"

"I... I'll be there, Ryōta." Akashi hung up. Kise couldn't stop himself from rocking on the balls of his feet for a few seconds. Then he cheerfully walked on. While he was excited to see Kuroko again, he couldn't exactly drop everything to hang out with him, no matter how much he wanted to. No, but Kise would finish his work here then meet up with Kuroko.

"I will see you again, Kurokocchi." Kise promised the bluenette, "Promise. And this time around, I'll treat you better than before. I'll _be_ better than before."

**[A/N: If this chapter makes you think that this is a AkaKuro, or KiKuro, or even a GoMxKuro, that's completely understandable. I reread my work, and I cringed at how dangerously close to become one of those three, or even all three of those pairings. But I'll remind you again. This fanfiction doesn't have a pairing. Maybe a platonic (friendly, not sexual) AllxKuro, if you really wanted to know.]**


	2. Street Mutt

**A/N: WARNING! WARNING! WARNING I don't really think that you need to read most of this until the Time Skip, unless you actually care about Kuroko monologuing, introducing Ash, and offering small details. Just thought it would be fair if I warned you.**

**Kuroko P.O.V.**

I don't remember the last time I've flown in a plane. Actually, that's not true. Well, technically, that's true, since I don't remember the last time I've flown _in_ an airplane. I've flown _on_ one though, but that's a story for another time.

I know you're probably wondering why I trusted Kise. I mean, for me it felt like I'd just met him. Kise could have easily been a con-artist, or something. But I just felt a connection with him, like my instincts were telling me to trust him. And since, while navigating my old life, I have nothing but my instincts and wits, I literally have no choice but to trust myself, as difficult as that might be. For me, there are two phases of my life, the Before the Crash, or the Before, and the After the Crash, the After. I know nothing about the Before, except for official things (my grandfather pulled in a couple of favors to get some of my files from Japan).

I have no idea if I had a love-life, if I was a nerd, what my likes were, or even who I knew. My phone was destroyed in the plane crash. I know that I lived in Tokyo, Japan, went to Seirin High, Teiko Middle School, and went to Hideaki Elementary. I know that I got average grades, which doesn't make sense, because I'm actually really smart. But that is all I know. Whenever I think about trying to find my old life, I feel a bit queasy and lost.

How do I start? Do you know how _big_ Japan is? Sure, it's a tiny fucking island compared to America, but that doesn't mean shit in the perspective of things like entire fucking countries. Japan is still about _**145,936 mi²**_.I could start at my schools, but I have no idea where they are, and how to get access to my files once I _actually get to my schools._

Anyways, I claimed a window seat so I could stare out the clouds. I think I've changed a lot. I mean, I've seen my photos from when I just got out of the hospital. My eyes were a pale blue, but now their more of a vast ocean instead. Or a deep sky. The doctors think the reason for my eyes changing color is because of the sudden temperature change. I know that I got really tall in the past few years. Like, 6'1" tall. Before I was about 5 1/2 ft.

I believe I would be in my last year of high school, but I don't go to school anymore so I wouldn't know. Plus, I'm pretty sure that Japan and California have different school schedules, so hell if I know. A kid started crying so I placed on my bulky around-the-head headphones and pulled out my iPod, scrolling through my songs. I most often hear American songs, and so to keep up with my fellow Street Mutts, I don't listen to J-Pop often (Even if the meanings in the songs are much more deep than American songs). Now I'm listening to "If I Can't Have You" by Shawn Mendes.

The fast beat makes my feet tap and my hands jump and twist together. I stared at the endless expanse of clouds. I think of how wonderful it would be to just live there, in an eternal whiteness. But then, I'd never experience another midnight run atop the roofs of L.A., I'd never get to spend another day with Ash. Ah, right. Ash is my digital friend I met on Instagram. We exchanged numbers and text each other regularly. And, lucky me, Ash lives in Japan. As much as I really want to find out who I am independently, I think that a friend will help me a lot.

I sigh. I still didn't believe that I let Ash talk me into returning to Japan. Ash said that a lot of people are probably worried for me. That's probably true, but... to be honest, I really don't know what I'm going to say to those said people. I don't know them at all, and I don't think they know the new me.

I guess I should say it. When I first came to America, I stayed with my grandparents for a little while. The first half of my first year. But then they passed away, and me, barely able to speak English, could not find a job. Eventually, I started living on the streets.

I earned the name Blue Phoenix after a tattoo I gave myself. On my back, there is a beautifully vibrant and detailed phoenix. It has a long tail, and is the same blue as my eyes. The wings cover my shoulder blades and the wingtips slowly fade it a black. The tail follows this pattern as well.

I made it myself, drawing it onto a piece of special paper. Then, with the help of a trusted fellow Street Mutt, I brushed chemicals onto the paper with it against my back. This made the ink spread into my skin. I made this tactic up myself. It is painless, and the colors are much more vibrant.

But I digress. I am now a "Street Mutt." Homeless and without a penny. I steal food, but I try to take only what I need. I sometimes stop by food drives. Most fellow Mutts think that stopping by food drives strips you of your dignity because it means that you're unable to fend for yourself, and that makes you weak. I just think of it as time- and energy-saving.

I've gotten into countless street-fights. Their actually kind of fun. There's just this kind of thrill to it. But I wouldn't suggest it. It's like nicotine. It feels good, like a spur-of-the-moment high, but then afterwards you feel drained. And when you feel drained, you feel the need for more. Yeah, at least I had a strong enough mentality to know when to stop. Others were not as lucky.

I've become a Veteran Street Mutt. I hold that title high. Now my iPod is playing "Brother" by Kodaline. I like it. It reminds me of my relationship with Ash. We start landing. My stomach clenches. Not just because we're landing, but because I might want to find out who I am, but I have no idea where or how to start looking.

**[Time Skip]**

I didn't bring anything but my headphones and my iPod. Oh, and a charger. I hoped to nick some food on the way, but no luck. Who knew Japanese security was one to rival America's? So by the time I was walking away from the airport, I was starving. I looked around. It was a clear sunny sky, with few clouds.

I just walked. I had no idea where I was going. I was wandering. I came across a small dark alley with a few trashcans in it. What caught my eyes was a tall dark blue haired man and an equally tall dark red haired man. They were cornered against a wall, surrounded by a Pack of 5, all dark ravenettes. They looked like they were about to beat up. I saw the faces of the red and blue haired men.

I'm not entirely sure what I felt right then, but I knew that I had to stop the fight. Normally, no one takes sides against a fight that has nothing to do with them. But I couldn't help it.

"Oi!" I called out, trying to ooze as much confidence as I could, "Stop it, teme." the Pack turned to me, snarling like wolves who'd just been interrupted from their meal.

"Stay out of this, m'kay?" growled one. I laughed. I couldn't help it. I was already feeling the rush of adrenaline. Now that I think about it, street-fighting is my heroin. Crazy dangerous and the after effects absolutely suck, but it gives you a crazy awesome feel. A rush of adrenaline. The thrill when you land a blow on a stronger opponent. The singing in your bones when you win.

"Sorry, as a Street Mutt, I can't take an order from no one." I retorted coolly. The red and blue haired men stared at me in utter shock. I have no idea why.

"Hey-" A tall ravenette walked towards me but cut himself off as he flung a fist at me. I jerked back and grabbed his arm. I twisted it past me, hearing his satisfying yelp and jamming my knee into his arm. I heard a crack and assumed I broke his arm. But just for safety reasons, I made sure to kick him as hard as I could when he hit the ground. The other stared at me in shock.

"Care for a taste?" I taunted. The others scattered, fleeing for their lives. I snorted at their disloyalty. You don't turn your back on your Pack, their closer than blood, and that is Pack Law. You give you utmost loyalty to your Pack, for they are your family, you're only home, and your only safeguard against others. You do not just run away and leave your Pack-mate to the mercy of another. But the blue-haired man interrupted my thoughts.

"T-Tetsu?" He asked uncertainly. I narrowed my eyes at him. How did he know my name? Did I know him from Before? I certainly had never seen him before. But a small part of by brain pricked. I pushed away all my thoughts and listened to my emotions. There was a huge wall of... trust? I had never felt this way towards anyone, much less two people. I felt like I would hand them control over my life and I wouldn't even look back at them to see what they would do with it.

I refused to let my guard drop, no matter what I felt. I guess I know him. I had found that whenever I met someone I knew in the Before, I feel emotions for reasons I don't know. And there are no memories to go with said emotions. The blue-haired man and the red-haired man just stared at me as if I had come back to life.

I didn't answer, and locked my knees and straitened my back. I let my hands ball into fists, and lifted my chin defiantly. I might trust him, but that was from now-nonexistent memories from 3 years ago. Who knew what these men were like? I slowly started to back away.

"W-wait!" the red-haired man shouted, holding his hand out in a stopping gesture(I didn't stop slowly backing away), though he made no sudden movements, "A-are you Kuroko Tetsuya?" I twisted away without replying and sprinted away. Yeah, a weak-ass move, but I just... I wasn't ready to confront my past yet.


	3. Katzenjammer

**[A/N: This chapter takes place a week from the previous chapter. The day is the 21st of April.]**

I was sitting at Maji's Burger. My beats on my head playing, "Please Don't Go" by Joel Adams. The sad music helped calm my nerves, or at least try to. But try as I might, I couldn't ignore the clenching and unclenching of my stomach. I was so nervous. I _hated_ disappointing people. But my friends, based on how Kise-kun had acted, and those other men, they think I've been gone for a really long time, and they've just started healing.

How will they react when they figure out that I don't know who they are? I guess, I haven't really returned to them. I may be Kuroko Tetsuya, but I'm not their Kuroko Tetsuya. Really, I'm more like a stranger. I hold the same name, but I have a different "soul." A different person in me.

I was internally panicking. I was _not_ ready to confront my old friends. What should I say? "Oh yeah, I just took a little vacation in America, sorry for not telling you." or something? I mean, I know that I don't have a criminal record from Japan, so either I was as good as evading the law enforcement as I am now, or I was a really law-abiding citizen. I think it's more of the latter, based on how I felt terrible, like, influenza terrible when I stole my first loaf of bread. So how will my old friends react to my new life? Of running on the streets, stealing and street-fighting left and right?

My old friends, whoever they may be, don't know what hardships I've been through. They don't know what made me go like this. How can they possibly except me for who I am? How can they possibly understand that I am this way because acting like this is the only way to survive? Can they understand that?

**[A/N: Sorry for the REALLY short chapter, but I just wanted to show what Kuroko was worrying about, but he's not going to be the main protagonist of this section in the story! Tell me what you think about The Blue Phoenix!]**


	4. Mourning Together

[A/N: If you are confused about the whole timeline because of this chapter, don't worry, because I haven't quite figured out everything yet, so that's okay. Anyways, this will also be on the 21st, but from Akashi's point of view.]

Akashi slipped on a blazer, hung tie around his neck (but didn't actually tie it, because that would just waste time), and didn't even bother with fixing his bedhead. Though it wasn't as bad as Kuroko's, it certainly was a far stretch from his usual cut. He ran to catch the train from Kyoto to Tokyo. Akashi had just called a meeting with the GoM at Seirin. He had said it was an emergency, so everyone should be there.

Akashi was so, so nervous. He hadn't seen Tetsuya in years. Once Akashi had heard those words, "Kurokocchi, Akashicchi! I found Kurokocchi!" Akashi felt a chill on him. Akashi's whole world had turned numb. Akashi couldn't taste his own cooking, he couldn't feel accomplishment when his perfect final exams came in. Because Kuroko was back. It had been devastating for the GoM, when they realized that Kuroko wasn't... anywhere.

[Recap]

They searched high and low, Seirin and a few members from their own teams helping to find the phantom sixth man. Eventually, they gave up. Not even Akashi, with his government resources, could find Kuroko. And if Akashi couldn't do it, then no one could.

That was one of the worst moments that Akashi could ever live through. To sit in a chair at Maji's, waiting for everyone to come. To know what he was going to crush in his friends. To know their reactions. To know that Kuroko was gone. To know... everything that was going to happen. Akashi knew the others well enough to know.

But knowing is different than seeing. It was so much worse. To see the hope die in their eyes. To feel the despair, knowing that Akashi was so damn helpless. He couldn't offer anything that would make them feel better. So he had just sat there in silence. He didn't bother keeping a straight posture. He had stayed in a leaning forward position, he hands clasped together, his elbows on his knees. Akashi couldn't meet their eyes that day. He couldn't make himself watch the light in their eyes die away to nothing.

Kise quit basketball. He said he just needed a breather, that one day, he would be back to stay for good. He left for America and set his eyes on his modeling career, though he never lost touch with his old basketball friends. Aomine kept playing, though he was forever scared. The GoM held a special place in his heart that no one could fill. Since he was the closest with Kuroko, he had taken it the hardest. Aomine fell into a sort of depressed haze. He actually went to practice, on time and everything.

Wakamatsu had been really worried for Aomine, mostly because Aomine went through practice without complaining or uttering a word. Wakamatsu, Sakarai, and Imayoshi went around the other schools to try to ask for help from the GoM to help cheer Aomine up. Even for the GoM, Aomine's sudden obedience was unsettling. Though with the help of Kagami and the GoM, he moved on, even if he would always care for Kuroko in his heart.

Midorima had kept trucking on, though. Midorima mourned at home, but kept up a tight schedule at school and basketball. But somehow, Midorima managed to keep up his social life (or lack thereof). Akashi had marveled at how Midorima had accepted this news so... in stride.

Midorima had told Akashi the day they called off looking for Kuroko, "Kuroko has chosen a new life, without us, for a reason. I can respect his decision, or lack of it. Kuroko knows what he wants. If we, for some reason, have wronged him, then there is no sense in rushing him. He'll come back when he's ready, and from there, all we can do is accept the inevitable. It is wrong to selfishly force our own wishes upon him. Can you do that, Akashi?" Akashi wasn't sure. But Akashi had clung to these words.

Akashi knew that Seirin and Kagami were mourning, that they dearly missed their younger brother. But the refused to let his absence dampen them. They fought on, Kuroko's spirit pushing them forward. Akashi envied them. They were a family. Kuroko had strengthened their bonds.

Murasakibara had skipped practice and school for a week. Akashi let that slide because he knew that Murasakibara was in mourning. Akashi didn't know all the details (and he didn't need to), but Himuro had said that Murasakibara had had lots of crying fits and his mood would shift a lot. Finally, Himuro begged Akashi for help, because the purple giant was just wasting away in his room, and that wasn't good for Murasakibara.

Akashi's direct words to Murasakibara were, "Get going in your life, Atsushi. Tetsuya would be disappointed in you if you could not battle him because your grades were poor or you hadn't been practicing." Akashi had waited for confirmation from Murasakibara before hanging up. Then Akashi had leaned back in his desk chair. He was so stressed.

Akashi had to maintain his school-life with just as much diligence as before. Plus, he was the captain of the basketball team at Rakuzan. If Akashi broke down, who would take care of his team? Akashi sighed. Tried to remind himself that school comes first no matter what.

Plus, as a last resort, Akashi can always count on his teammates. Right?

[End of Recap]

Akashi tried to push away his doubt. He was going to meet Kuroko, and Kuroko would tell them what they did wrong, and how they could fix it. Kuroko was going to tell them, and everyone would make up. Akashi could already imagine the bluenette's disapproving frown.

"Is that train?" Akashi muttered underneath his breath. For all he knew, everyone else was already there. Though that was unlikely. Akashi tapped his foot against the ground impatiently. This was the day to meet Kuroko. Akashi hadn't told the others yet, he wanted Kise and Kuroko to confirm everything first. Akashi couldn't bear to see their eyes die again.

At last, the anxious pressure on his chest forced Akashi to take action. It would take too long to try to rally up the entire station to start working just for him, and nothing would come out of filing a complaint. Then, an idea sparked in his mind. What if he ran all the way from Kyoto to Seirin? After all, if what Kise said was true, if he really found Kuroko, then Akashi would want to spend the whole day with Kuroko, talking about life with their friends.

So running about 297.2 mi (478.9 km) should make up for missing practice, right? And Akashi can always text his team the workout, and Akashi will be able to tell if they're lying about saying they completed it or not. So that's exactly what Akashi did.

[GIANT Time Skip]

Akashi thought he might die from exhaustion. He actually started to doubt his decision. Akashi had taken off his blazer and shirt underneath. Akashi was tempted to also take off his pants, it was so goddamn hot, but Akashi still carried his dignity.

At last, when Akashi's chest felt like it was going to cave in on him, he burst through the doors of the gym. Akashi couldn't breath properly. He dropped his blazer and shirt on the ground, not caring that they were getting dirty. Akashi rested his hands on his knees, hardly able to stand straight. He heard Seirin rushing to him, asking what was wrong. Akashi held up a finger, signaling to them to let him catch his breath.

After a couple minutes, Akashi's heart rate dropped down to a normal pace, and his breathing became less of desperate gasps and more like the breaths of a person who was trying hard not to hyperventilate. While he stood up to face them, Akashi couldn't keep the grin off his face.

"Did you run from Kyoto to Tokyo?" Kagami couldn't keep the question in. Akashi nodded.

"Hai."

"NANI?!?!?!" Everyone yelled. That was expected. Akashi pushed down his laugh.

"I have an urgent-" But Akashi was cut off by the other GoM members coming slamming the door open and rushing in.

"Akashi called an emergency meeting." Midorima explained before Seirin could ask.

"Ah, gomen," Akashi apologized sheepishly, "I guess I was so excited, I guess I forgot to tell you that it isn't a life-or-death emergency. Did I interrupt your studies?" Everyone stared at Akashi. This is basically somewhere along the lines of what was running through everyone's mind: 'He's in such a good mood... What made him feel like this? He's grinning like mad, and he practically admitted a mistake! What's up with the Emperor?'

"A-ah, no." Aomine stuttered, "I was taking a small break." The others nodded with Aomine's statement.

"Good." Akashi nodded, "Now, I have news." Everyone looked at him apprehensively.

"About... Kuroko-kun." Coach said after a solemn silence threatened the group. Akashi nodded, still beaming.

"Last week..." Akashi hesitated. Should he tell them? Would they break again if he was wrong? No, they were stronger than this. "Ryota called me at 12 o'clock in the morning. He said... he found a man named Kuroko Tetsuya in America."

[A/N: Let's just pretend that from Kyoto to Tokyo WON'T take 102 hours walking, m'kay? And I actually looked this up, so the data is accurate.]


	5. A Speck of Blue

**Akashi P.O.V.**

...

"Nande?!" Everyone shouted. Akashi nodded.

"Yup."

"I-Is it true?" Kagami asked tentatively, "Have we found him?"

"I'm not sure." Akashi shrugged, "But that's why I came here, I wanted to inform you that with Taiga, the GoM would be meeting with Ryota and supposedly Tetsuya. We will, of course, tell you the outcome of the meeting."

"Okay, but Kagami can only go after practice." Coach said, "Then he'll go meet up with you... wherever you're going." Akashi nodded.

"We'll wait for you at Maji's." Kagami nodded. Then they left.

**[Time Skip]**

Aomine was ordering a bunch as always. Murasakibara got a vanilla milkshake added to his large pile of sweets. Midorima ordered one burger and some water. Akashi himself also only ordered a burger. Akashi was looking around for an open place to sit. Then, he noticed a man wearing jeans and a black jacket.

The hood was up, but Akashi could see light blue hair peeking out of the hood. His head was bowed, so Akashi couldn't see his face. He was sitting at a table large enough to seat more than one person, so Akashi wondered if he was waiting for more people.

Then an odd thought struck him.

"Sumimasen." Akashi said, walking up to him. The man didn't react, so Akashi tried again, getting closer and louder, "Sumimasen, might I trouble you for your name?" The man ignored Akashi. Akashi could tell because he had been right in front of the man when he had spoken. Literally. Akashi's face was less than an inch away from the man's hood. Akashi had put his tray down on the man's table, not wanting to spill and waste food if he lost his temper.

Now Akashi was ticked off.

"Fool, answer me." Again, no response. Now, Midorima and Murasakibara had come over while Aomine was waiting for his food. Midorima put a hand on Akashi's shoulder. "I got this" was what the gesture said. Midorima walked up to the man and tapped his head.

The man jerked up in surprise, and the hood fell off. It revealed white around-the-head headphones on his head. The man had pale blue hair, and almond eyes that slanted upwards. They were beautiful. They were azure blue, a lighter shade than Aomine's. But they were... different. Aomine's flat dark cerulean disks. This man's eyes looked like you were staring at a fragment of the ocean. Clear and never-ending.

The man quickly pressed a button on the side of his headphones. He pulled his headphones down to hang around his neck.

"Ah, gomen, were you speaking to me?" the man asked politely, "My headphones are noise-cancelling so I can't hear you." Akashi's throat felt constricted. Why did this man feel so familiar, yet so foreign? What about him made Akashi instantly at ease, yet somehow... not?

"A-ah, hai, I was." Akashi managed to say after realizing that there was awkward silence, "May I trouble you for you're name?" The man tilted his head questioningly at Akashi and opened his mouth to answer.

"KUROKOCCHI!" A loud and obnoxious voice wailed, "I missed you-ssu!" Kise. Akashi whipped around in surprise... but he was too late. Kise flew past Akashi, Murasakibara, and Midorima at breakneck speed and attacked the man with a full-on bone-crushing bear-hug. Kuroko's eyes were wide before he collected himself and greeted Kise with nearly the same amount enthusiasm.

Akashi struggled to comprehend, causing him to simply blink at the bluenette. _'Tetsuya?'_ This man... was Kuroko? Midorima had the same reaction. His eyes wide and mouth agape.

"Kuro-chin?" Murasakibara muttered. Previously, he had been just standing off to the side. Now he was leaning forward to study Kuroko. Kuroko flashed him a wide grin.

"Akashicchi! Midorimacchi! Murasakibaracchi!" Kise cried out, still clinging to Kuroko, "You came!" Akashi nodded dumbly.

"Ah, well, before we get on the wrong foot..." Kise trailed off awkwardly, suddenly sheepish and serious, "Kurokocchi, please explain your condition right now." Condition? Akashi grew apprehensive, and he felt his stomach drop. Was there something wrong with Kuroko? No, that was a stupid question. There was obviously something wrong with Kuroko. So the more adequate question would be, "_What_ was wrong with Kuroko?"

"Ah, right." Kuroko nodded, still smiling, "When I was 15, I got in a plane crash when I was flying to America from Japan. This accident led me to have permanent amnesia. I've been living in America ever since. Sorry." Amnesia? Kuroko didn't remember them?

"You don't remember us." Midorima concluded grimly. Kise wailed at how everyone was ignoring him. Aomine, having finally gotten all his food (the glutton), came over. He had heard the loud and obnoxious sounds coming from the man-child and had decided to shut it up for the staff.

"Yo, Kise! Shut up, will ya? You're bothering the others." Aomine nodded at the blonde. Then he realized what Kise was doing and he frowned, "Kise, you know you're manhandling that dude, right?" Kise wailed even louder.

"Aominecchi, I'm not a baka like you-ssu!" He cried, "And this is Kurokocchi-ssu!" Aomine's eyebrow twitched. Akashi sighed. Somehow, the aho had missed the fact that Kise had clearly said, "This is Kuroko." Honestly, sometimes his ex-teammates were so stupid. Aomine dragged Kise off of Kuroko and started yelling at Kise.

"... Are they together?" Kuroko finally asked. Akashi couldn't answer. This was just... overwhelming. Kuroko was back. After so many years, and totally different. Akashi had mourned Kuroko like he had died. In fact, to his friends, he might as well have. 2 years of nothing, no way to know what happened to Kuroko, or why he left, and now, he's back, like this. Wearing jeans and a T-shirt, headphones over his shoulders, _much_ taller than Akashi, and with a mop for hair.

"No, Aomine does not swing that way." Midorima sighed, "Even though he was the best and handling Kise's energy level." Kuroko blinked at the blonde fake-wilting beneath Aomine's harsh tone.

"I see." Kuroko finally said. Akashi questioned the truth in that statement, but honestly, when you see this scene as an outsider, what can you do to understand? After all, there's a fine line between love and hate.

"Mine-chin was really good at handling Kise-chin when you went away." Murasakibara agreed. Akashi noticed Kuroko's lips pursing slightly.

"I apologize for making you worry." Kuroko gave them a lopsided smile that cooled the hairs on the back of his neck that he hadn't realized ha been bristling, instantly relax slightly, "But I have come back here with intentions to make up for my absence." Akashi studied Kuroko again. Perhaps Kuroko hadn't changed as much as Akashi had thought. Appearances and expressions aside, Kuroko was still the mild-mannered, deadpan, monotone quirky teen that Akashi knew.

"Hey, aren't you that man from a few days back?" Akashi jumped in surprise. Had Aomine seen Kuroko before? What had happened? Well, if Aomine's question was anything to go by, Kuroko had not given out his name.

Kuroko blinked, looking surprised. Akashi waited for his response.

"I believe so, yes." Kuroko said calmly, "Why do you ask?" Aomine have him a look, like, 'don't play dumb.' Kuroko just blinked at him blankly. Even though Kuroko's presence, however weak it was, offered protection and a sort of quiet calm that Akashi hadn't felt in a while, Akashi would be lying if he didn't say he felt nervous and on edge.

He hadn't noticed it before, but he had been feeling like this since he first saw Kuroko's eyes, the feeling steadily growing as he spent more time with Kuroko. Why? He wasn't sure.

Just... something was off with Kuroko. Something about him set Akashi off. There was a constant feeling of a small knife, sliding underneath his skin and skinning him. Was... Kuroko lying to Akashi? Akashi wasn't sure. Was this even Kuroko? Why was Akashi off-put by Kuroko?

Akashi was familiar with this uneasy feeling. He got it whenever a fellow Rakuzan student made a mistake and tried to lie their way out of it. It was a subconscious sixth sense trying to warn Akashi. But Kuroko has no reason to lie to Akashi. But Akashi knew his instincts never lied.

"Akashi!"

Midorima's voice cut through Akashi's voice like a hot knife to butter.

"Are you okay?" Midorima studied Akashi carefully. Akashi realized that he had been spacing out, and the others had continued the conversation without him.

"Ah, warri, yes." Akashi reassured them, seeing as they weren't convinced, he quickly thought up another excuse, "Just thinking about how to deal with some disrespectful first-years." Everyone shuddered, but they let it go. No one wanted to aggravate Akashi with just the thought of those poor nonexistent first-years.

Akashi noticed Kuroko looking at him more piercingly than the others. Akashi's unnerving feeling intensified. Kuroko didn't break his stare until Akashi returned it for a minute. Akashi didn't realize he had been holding his breath until he started breathing again.

It puzzled Akashi to no end. Why was he feeling like this?


	6. I'm Sorry For The Pain I've Caused

**[A/N: This is Kuroko's point of view during the last half of the previous chapter, and a little beyond the ending. When I was writing this, I realized that I had no idea where everyone was. So I'll just tell you know now that I'll leave it up to your imagination.]**

**Kuroko P.O.V.**

"Are they together?" I asked the redhead. He seemed a little shocked, and unable to answer. He just studied me closely, reminding me of a cat whose prey had fallen into their paws.

"No, Aomine does not swing that way." The green Skittle sighed, answering for the redhead when it was obvious he was not going to say anything, "Even though he was the best and handling Kise's energy level." I watched Kise obviously-fake-wilt under Aomine's harsh voice. _How were they not together when they're quarreling like boyfriend-and-boyfriend right now?_

"I see." Was all I said. I didn't really understand, but it was the polite thing to do. Besides, this was just one of those things where you'd have to know them for a while to understand. One of their little quirks. Did I have any?

"Mine-chin was really good at handling Kise-chin when you went away." The purple one said seriously. My stomach clenched. Did I have that big of an impact when I went away? Did my friends really miss me that much? Did I cause them that much pain?

That was the moment when I realized what I should say.

"I apologize for making you worry." I gave them a smile that I hoped was reassuring, "But I have come back here with intentions to make up for my absence." The green Skittle smiled slightly, and the purple Skittle just nodded. The redhead looked at me intently, neither negative nor positive emotions displayed on his face. I wonder what he's thinking.

Was he judging me for not coming back before? Or was he happy that I had simply come back eventually? Maybe he was drinking me in. Before I could properly decide, a small smile flirted over his mouth for a second before quickly vanishing.

"Hey, aren't you that man from a few days back?" My heart jumped in surprise when Aomine's voice was suddenly right next to my ear. I nearly socked him in the face! I kept my reaction under wraps, a tiny blink of shock notwithstanding.

"I believe so, yes." I replied as calmly as I could manage, "Why do you ask?" Aomine have me a look, like, 'don't play dumb.' I gave him a blank face to piss him off. Think of it as a little bit of revenge for somehow taking me by surprise.

"That was really impressive, by the way." Aomine gave me a couple begrudging nods. I returned it curtly. "What's your name?" I fought down a smile. I had a few friends back in America who were extremely blunt and straightforward like Aomine.

"My name is Kuroko Tetsuya." I half-bowed in my seat as best I could politely, "Nice to meet you." I pushed down a laugh with all my willpower (though I couldn't keep my lips from twisting into a smirk) at Aomine's bewildered expression. For several minutes, nothing happened.

Then pulled himself together. He glared at me full force. I hadn't met someone who is brave enough to glare at me like that in a while.

"No, seriously. Who are you?" Aomine asked. I sighed. The others were so much more believing. This would be annoying. I'll have to explain everything to him.

"I am Kuroko Tetsuya. When I was 15, I got in an airplane crash when I was flying from Japan to America. This resulted in me getting complete amnesia." I explained. Aomine's expressions kept shifting and diving. All his emotions splayed over his face like black ink on a new book.

I saw doubt with the smallest hint of realization first. Aomine couldn't believe what I'd just said, though he trusted his friends and deep down, he believed them. But that was deep, deep down. Then he looked at Kise's face. The minuscule realization exploded like recorded water splattered on water-paint on high speed.

Now there was shock and hope. I didn't really understand why there was hope there, but I was glad that he believed me. Can you imagine how troublesome it would have been to convince him somehow? Not mention... I really wanted to have him believe me. That meant that my Before friends might accept me. I think. Maybe?

"Te-Tetsu..." he breathed. I might not have caught it, if I wasn't listening hard. Kise and Midorima (not really) discreetly slid away. I was grateful they gave us privacy to talk. About what shit I'd been doing.

"Yes?"

"I... I just... I thought you were dead..." he breathed. I motioned for him to sit across from me. He plopped down, still in a daze. I lower my gaze. A pang of guilt vibrates inside of me like a shriek in a hollow cave.

"I'm sorry."

That snaps him out of it. He looks a little surprised, though still lost. He smiled at me. A bittersweet smile. Like he's coming to terms with the loss of a loved one. The pure loss in his smile makes me squirm.

"Don't be. I... no, I shouldn't have given up on you." He gave a humorless laugh, "You're Tetsu. The amazing Phantom Sixth Man of the Generation of Miracles. There's nothing you can't do." I blinked. Was I really that amazing? If that's the case, then how am I going to live up to that? I don't want to disappoint anyone. But how can I not?

This is like being asked to climb a sheer cliff with no gear. I have never felt more insignificant in my life.

"I guess it's not fair." Aomine hung his head so his face was shadowed, "Amnesia, right? You're practically a different person. It's not fair for me to expect something like that from you. Sorry." My stomach sinks slightly at his disheartening words. In another case, I might protest, I'm totally up for the challenge! Don't underestimate me!

But here, he's completely right. I'm practically a different person. Kuroko Tetsuya died. And I was born in the ashes. How can I possibly disagree with something so obviously right?

The redhead's spacing out. His eyes are glazed and his posture is relaxed. Is he okay? What's he thinking about?

"Akashi-kun?" No response.

"Akashi-kun, are you okay?" I ask again. Midorima seemed to realize Akashi was not responding.

"Akashi! Akashi! Akashi! Are you okay?!" He cried, leaning closer to the redhead with each cry. Akashi jumped and looked at Midorima in surprise. It took a few moments for Akashi to respond.

"Ah, Warri, yes." He gave a reassuring smile. No one was convinced, so he quickly added, "Just thinking about how to deal with some disrespectful first-years." For some reason, I shivered. Disturbing images passed through my mind, like a bunch of young high schoolers hung upside down and gutted like ducks... that's all I'll share for now. There was more but... for the rating's sake, I'll keep it as that.

Midorima and Kise relaxed and let it go, Aomine too. But I my gut told me Akashi was lying. I didn't let my gaze drop from the redhead, as if I pressured him with my gaze enough, he would speak the truth.

As if he could sense the intensity of my stare, he stared back. Feeling like a butterfly underneath a magnifying glass, I let my gaze wander back to Aomine and just watched Aomine scarf down his teriyaki burgers. But my mind was with Akashi. Why did he lie about what he was thinking about?

**[A/N: Sorry if this chapter makes it seem like an AkaKuro fic, it's not.]**


	7. To Ash, The Greatest Friend Alive

**[A/N: This takes place in America. This is how "Ash" convinced Kuroko to go visit Japan again. Oh, and this is all in English, because library computers don't have the ability to type in a different language. I don't know about your libraries, though. Is that just for mine?]**

**Ash: Yo**

**Ash: Blu**

**BluPhoenix: Hello.**

**Ash: You hear what happened at El Paso**

**BluPhoenix: I don't need someone on the other side of the world to tell me what happened in my **_**own **_**country.**

**Ash: Yea, yea**

**Ash: I was just worried**

**BluPhoenix: I can look after myself.**

**Ash: That doesn't mean my heart doesn't stop every time some shit like that happens in the US**

**Ash: Seriously**

**Ash: What if it had been you**

**BluPhoenix: You know I would have been fine. No one knows who I am. They would have treated me and I would say I'm a foreigner. In Japanese. That should get my message across.**

**Ash: Does America have a system for that**

**BluPhoenix: Fuck knows.**

**Ash: That's what I mean**

**BluPhoenix: Ash, calm down. You sound like my grandmother when she told me to join Instagram. I don't need two mothers.**

**Ash: Good**

**Ash: That was the best damn thing she could have told you**

**BluPhoenix: Because I met you, "the best damn man on earth that has ever has and will exist"?**

**Ash: Is that even a question**

**BluPhoenix: Yes.**

**Ash: So mean**

**BluPhoenix: Ash, just because I've known you for a several months now doesn't make you the best man I've ever met.**

**Ash: Then who is**

**BluPhoenix: ...**

**Ash: AHA SEE**

**BluPhoenix: Will you calm down. I can practically hear your obnoxious laughter from over here.**

**Ash: I've just reread our conversation and realized you changed the subject without my notice**

**BluPhoenix: Just now? Don't you have amazing eyesight? Or was that just your ego talking.**

**Ash: Shut up**

**Ash: I have awesome eyesight**

**Ash: Srsly tho Blu**

**Ash: What if you never got to meet your amazing past self because you'd died**

**BluPhoenix: I assure you, nothing would have been lost on my behalf.**

**BluPhoenix: Because I'd be dead.**

**Ash: Blu**

**BluPhoenix: What?**

**Ash: And I'd never get to meet you face-to-face**

**BluPhoenix: We can meet right now. Video chat.**

**Ash: Hell no**

**Ash: International calls cost an arm and a leg**

**BluPhoenix: I know for a fact that most places in America won't sell their network for an arm and a leg. You should sic the police on your companies. Maybe switch?**

**Ash: That's not what I meant Blu and you know that**

**BluPhoenix: Is that so?**

**Ash: Yes**

**BluPhoenix: I beg to differ.**

**Ash: Declined**

**Ash: Anyways**

**Ash: You should go back to Japan**

**BluPhoenix: Where did this come from? And no. I'm perfectly fine here, thank you very much. Talking to you with library computers, snatching food every day or so, this is my life. I don't need to move across the world to do the exact same thing.**

**Ash: So don't**

**Ash: Come back and meet your family, friends**

**BluPhoenix: I don't **_**need**_** to. I'm fine right where I am. I **_**don't**_** need to talk to a bunch of random Japanese people I've never met.**

**Ash: **_**Technically**_**, you have met them before**

**BluPhoenix: **_**Psychologically**_**, I have never even seen them before. I see no reason to now.**

**Ash: Come on Blu**

**Ash: Would you have been able to live with yourself knowing that you never made amends to your old life**

**BluPhoenix: I am perfectly happy accepting the Before is done and gone. There's nothing that can be changed or done about it. The only thing that matters is the After.**

**Ash: Would you be okay with your family and friends believing your dead**

**BluPhoenix: XXXXXX XXXXXXX practically did die. He died on the plane crash, and I was born. And you spelled "you're" wrong. You spelled it as "your".**

**Ash: Fuck off smart-ass**

**Ash: If you had died at El Paso, or anywhere in general**

**Ash: I wouldn't be able to help you, because I don't know much about your profile, and I have to refuse to accept any information except for in person**

**BluPhoenix: Why is that?**

**Ash: Because it's a thing in my family**

**Ash: They have to deem you worthy to be my friend. Now back to the topic at hand**

**BluPhoenix: I don't know...**

**BluPhoenix: On one hand, I can't wait to see what I was like back in Japan. But on the other... who knows who I was? I'm already so invisible. What if that was because I made that choice? If I did, **_**why**_**?**

**Ash: Then this is your chance to find out**

**Ash: This could be a big clue to help you make your identity**

**Ash: My best friend lost one of his best friends**

**Ash: He blamed himself every which way. He believed he had caused it somehow and now there is no way to find the truth**

**Ash: And I wanted to help him so bad but I couldn't. I didn't know his friend very well beyond a few basic things**

**Ash: All I could do was watch as he drowned in his guilt and mourning**

**Ash: You can't let that happen to your friends**

**Ash: You can't let then stay in their guilt and mourning. It's not fair to them**

**BluPhoenix: But you're my friend. My Before friends are no longer my friends. Wouldn't it be better to leave that perfect image of me in their head than taint their minds with my current image?**

**Ash: Maybe**

**Ash: But maybe they'd fall in love with this version of you**

**Ash: Just like me**

**Ash: Just try**

**Ash: Don't leave them with nothing**

**Ash: Give them some closure**

**BluPhoenix: I can't afford an airfare. And no, I'm not plane-riding all the way to Japan.**

**Ash: I know you can't right now. But you can save up**

**BluPhoenix: But still. I'm reaching out to a bunch of people I don't know. I'm doing them a favor for a dead person.**

**Ash: Think of it as giving them condolences to their loss**

**Ash: Or that you're finally going to meet me**

**BluPhoenix: Face to face?**

**Ash: Yea**

**Ash: Come on Blu**

**Ash: Give them a chance**

**Ash: You're dissing people you've never met**

**BluPhoenix: That's the problem! They'll think they know me! They set up expectations about me that I'll never meet. I'm not XXXXXX XXXXXXX! I'm just Blu. And I sure as hell don't know them.**

**Ash: Just explain yourself**

**Ash: They'll understand**

**Ash: Otherwise why would you be friends with them**

**BluPhoenix: Good point.**

**BluPhoenix: But is it wrong to be nervous?**

**Ash: Absolutely not**

**Ash: I'm terrified too**

**BluPhoenix: Thank you for your support and utter faith.**

**Ash: No! Not because I don't believe in you. I do! But this is just such a daunting task ya know**

**BluPhoenix: Yes, I do. But... you're right. It's not fair for me to leave them like that.**

**Ash: That's the spirit**

**BluPhoenix: Don't you have school or some shit tomorrow?**

**Ash: Yea**

**Ash: But fuck that**

**BluPhoenix: When I reach Japan, I'll text you. Let you know where I am.**

**Ash: Yea**

**Ash: See you then**

**BluPhoenix: Til death do us part.**

**Ash: You still hooked on that**

**Ash: Til death do us part. ;p**


	8. Am I Worthy?

**Kuroko POV**

"So... you're Kuroko." Kagami Taiga was sitting in front of me at Maji. It was awkward. Kagami kept checking me out. I don't know if it's because of my looks, or if he couldn't believe I was actually here. Both are both very reasonable, understandable answers (translation: I have experienced both).

"Mm." Yes, how absolutely helpful. I quickly add a nod for emphasis. Don't think I've forgotten to text Ash. I'm just biding my time. Things have been hectic. I haven't found a secure place to bunker down. And I certainly don't feel comfortable enough to ask someone where I can hang out at. Though Ash says that the stereotypical Japanese person is extremely (overkill) polite. Is that true? Fuck knows.

"So... America then. You've stayed there for... 2 years?" _Is that not fucking obvious?!_

"Yes, I believe so." Should I try to pick up this failing conversation? No, I'll let him make the first move.

Kagami cleared his throat awkwardly. Kise and Aomine were arguing loudly about a set of algebra problems on a piece of paper between them. Midorima was yelling at them for being so dumb and explaining it to them. Akashi and Murasakibara just looked on with amusement shining in their eyes.

"No, it's '1/5(-5+20b-7c)-1/2(2b+7c-6a)'" Kise snapped, fiercely glaring at Aomine, "So it can't be '2a+2c'!" I do some quick mental calculations.

"Of course not!" Aomine fired back, "But it can't be '-7c+3b+2a'! If you solve it backwards, it doesn't work!" I stifle my laughter. Are they kidding? This was so simple. I've completed dozens of problems like this _in middle school. _Weren't they graduating this year? Why were they so dumb? My laughter threatened to bubble out. I glared at the paper and bit my lip in my effort to keep silent.

"Ahomine, do you even pay attention during school?" Midorima huffed exasperated. Aomine whipped around to face Midorima. More like glare him.

"Even Ku-Kuroko knows." Akashi stumbled a bit on my name, but he caught himself. My laughter nearly came out, but I quickly shoved it down. It was like pushing down slime. You had to evenly push down all of it. Otherwise, it would come up somewhere else.

Kise and Aomine turned to me in surprise. I felt the force everyone's gaze prickle my skin. I felt hot from their piercing looks, and combined with my laughter, my insides too warm. The absurdity of the fact the me, a Street Mutt, felt uncomfortable under a handful of stares, made the laughter worse. I must have been failing in hiding my amusement because Kise looked wounded, and Aomine furious.

"What (the hell) are you laughing at?!" They howled simultaneously. My laughter came spilling out like fudge in a freshly made and cut lava cake. It flowed over, rolling out and all around, smoothly floating through the room, like the gentle tinkling of bells.

"I-I'm s-sorry!" I managed after my laughter subsided (somewhat), "But... the answer is clearly '2a+3b-14c'!" Kise and Aomine flinched in disbelief. Kagami spluttered in shock, and Midorima's and Akashi's eyebrows were raised. Kagami moved so he was looking over my shoulder towards Kise and Aomine.

"Bu-but! You can't even see the paper from where you're sitting!" Kagami cried, "Did you seriously solve it from hearing Kise once?!" I blink. Does Kagami know how loud he is? He's making my ears ring.

"Yea. What's so hard about that?" I ask, "This is 7th grade math. Aren't you guys in around 12th grade material?" Seriously. This should come quickly to them. It's pretty simple. You distribute, then add like-terms. Do they realize that now?

Aomine turned back to the paper. His head was tilted, and the annoyance had long left his face, leaving no trace of itself. He scribbled out his work. Realization sparked in his eyes. It slowly but surely blew into a ferocious flame.

"Huh."

"How did you not get that the first time?!" Midorima hissed. My laughter slowly died out, though an amused smile never left my face. Aomine then proceeded to explain it to Kise. I pointed out Aomine's mistakes. We completed the rest of the worksheet like that.

"Thank Kami-sama you're back." Kagami commented flippantly. I jerked back in surprise, but quickly caught myself. The end result was a tiny flinch. The problem was, I wasn't the same. Kuroko Tetsuya wasn't _really_ back. But Kagami and the others seem so happy that I'm back. I don't think they realize it, but they sneak me glances. Like if they take their eyes off my for too long, I might disappear.

They smile at me, and I force myself to smile back. They talk about plans and after school activities they can do together. Do I even deserve to be here? Why _am_ I here? This group of friends, they're so comfortable with each other, but their concepts are completely foreign to me.

They don't _exclude _me. They make sure to explain anything that I don't understand. But even then, most of the things they talk about, you'd have to be there to fully understand. I'm sure Kuroko Tetsuya would understand. He would join in and laugh with them. He would talk at ease, and not just observe. He would be able to seamlessly slip into their conversation and add smart-ass and witty comments without caution.

He would talk and talk and talk to them (or at least get a few words in{damn they talk a lot}). But how can I? How the hell am I supposed to easily talk to them when I didn't know what this, "Winter Cup" was-is, a few seconds ago? Akashi keeps giving me the most piercing and lingering stares.

Like his stares are trying to pierce right through me.

"Yo, Kuroko," Kagami nudged me, shocking me a little, "You still need to meet Seirin. Ya know, your senpai and the rest of the team." Oh god. More people? That means more socializing... ah, and here I thought I could get away with just nodding and observing them. No way would Seirin let me just watch them.

"Mm," that sounded dispassionate, even to my ears, so I quickly added, "Of course I do." Okay, that sounded worse. Like I really, really_ don't_ want to meet my senpai. Or past-senpai. I do! Just, not right now. My mind is still struggling to try to sort out the GoM's little kinks and special behaviors, I really don't need to have to keep up with another group.

Aomine yawned, "A'ight. I need to head back soon, Satsuki will have my ass for dinner if I don't get back before 2." That's a pity. I like Aomine. He's really amusing, and good-natured. Plus, he's really lax. A nice break from the uptight and discipline of the others. He stood up and started to pack up.

"Bye, Aominecchi! We'll miss you-ssu!" Aomine rolled his eyes, though his eyes were affectionate.

"We'll be seeing each other in a few days."

"Sayonara, Aomine." Akashi gave a cool nod.

"See ya, Akashi." Aomine returned it.

"Make sure do your homework, Ahomine."

"Tsundere." Aomine snorted, though his voice lacked bite.

"Oi!"

"Mido-chin, it's true." Murasakibara nodded sagely, "But you shouldn't hold that against him, Mine-chin." Midorima glared at Murasakibara. He seemed to be holding back his tongue. Aomine snickered.

"Midorimacchi, shouldn't you and Kagamicchi start heading back soon?" Kise leaned forward, subtly offering a way for Midorima to salvage his slaughtered pride. Midorima nodded curtly. I smiled. They seemed so at ease with one another, so used to each other's antics. At this thought, my limbs went a little numb with fear and uncertainty. Why was I here? I'm so... misbehaved, to put it lightly. They were pure, innocent angels, so free from the crimes I committed. What right did I have to taint them? Why do I deserve to have them as my friends? They don't know that I've-

"Yea, we'd better head back." Kagami stood as well. I pushed all my doubts away, though they still clung to me like cotton on thorns. Whatever I deserved, or didn't deserve, I would have to wait to tangle out later. Preferably with Ash. Right now, all I knew was that these boys, they deserved to be happy, and I should try my hardest to do just that.

"Will I be coming with you?" I ask. I kind of hope I do. I would like to meet my senpai. But I also wouldn't. I know that Ash would want me to meet new people, but do you like socializing? I don't. I find it stressful and nerve-racking.

Ash says that that doesn't make an introvert, but I think he's wrong. I did some research, and I'm pretty certain I am an introvert. I don't need social stimulation, but rather, I feel better when I'm silently reading a book on a roof at midnight. I don't always like sitting alone, though. I am human. That _does_ make me an introvert. But I can never be 100% certain. That's impossible.

"Totally!" Kagami cried, his eyebrows raised in surprise, "They'll want to see you again. It would be cruel to make them wait." Right, I have to go because _I don't want to be mean,_ right. I keep my face impassive. They should get the chance to meet me. I can imagine Ash chiding me, using the imaginary voice I gave him.

_"It's only fair, Blu. If you met up with the GoM, you should say hello to your senpai as well."_

"Of course." I am saying that to Ash and Kagami. It's only fair.

Even if I don't deserve them as friends, this is my chance to make me deserve. Make myself worthy.

"My senpai deserve to see that I'm alive."


	9. Stay Healthy, Stay Safe, Stay Calm

Thank you for your indefinite patience, and I sincerely apologize. I'm neglecting my responsibilities as both a writer and a student. I'm currently refusing to do my homework and my other works (for now, but I'll head back to them soon). And I have, like, a month of nothing to do (because of CoV-19 and etc.), so I might be able to get out a couple chapters! Also, stay safe and clean, and don't panic. Honestly, I tried getting toilet paper today and there was none. Anywhere. Nor was there any wipes, paper towels, paper plates, or anything else. Seriously, calm down, people. I get that the media and etc. is making this epidemic sound super scary, like, I get that. But so long as you don't unnecessarily start touching people a lot, share food, or just generally behave not-hygienically, you won't get sick. Even then, young and healthy people get something along the lines of a mild cold. No big deal. And limit your media intake! Only read trusted sources, like that government website (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention I think), and if you do read things on the Internet, take them with a grain of salt. We need to get this message out there, for people not to panic! Please share this information with people. The less panic and mayhem and more order, the better we can slow down the spread and the quicker we can get rid of this virus! Stay healthy, stay safe, and stay calm.


	10. Ohana Means Family

**A/N: Hey, I'm back! I'm **_**super **_**sorry about the huge hiatus the Blue Phoenix took. I had a huge case of writer's block, and COVID-19 struck my family hard, especially since a large number of my aunts, uncles, and cousins are in the medical field. I don't even want to talk about school, now that that's starting up. I felt really bad for everyone who wanted to finish the Blue Phoenix, but never got past ten chapters (I think?), and I intended to continue writing, but never got around to it. The selling point was when someone commented, "Are you discontinuing?!" That's when I knew I had to get something out there. So even though this chapter is pretty crappy, and I didn't proofread it as thoroughly as I did for my previous chapters, here it is!**

* * *

I licked my lips apprehensively, still tasting salt from my meal at Maji Burger. It was a good restaurant, comparable to the burger places in America, which is saying something. Despite Kagami-kun's reassurance, a ball of nerves sat in my stomach, and there was an incurable dryness to my throat.

Kagami-kun struggled with the door for a few minutes, some English curses flew from his mouth, but he eventually got it. The suspense was not helping matters. There were probably sweat marks in my jacket, _visible _sweat marks. God, this was such a bad idea. Why did I let Ash talk me into this? Sentimentality? Fear prickled underneath my skin, setting even my teeth on edge.

"Right, you ready?" Kagami-kun studied me gravely as he gripped the door tightly, "Mentally prepare yourself, I've- we're a family, but we're rowdy... or so we've been told." Well, I might as well get this over with; it's not like it'll be any better if I hold off on this.

I nod and wipe the sweat off my clammy hands and flip on my hood, rubbing my headphones in hopes of calming my palpitating heart. It'll be more efficient if I set small, manageable goals for myself.

One, I should introduce myself. Even if my senpai already know who I am, I should inform the people of my past about my backstory- nothing too heavy, just the basics. They're my senpai, and if Kagami-kun's receptiveness towards them is anything to go by, we must be close.

Two... two is a work in process. It's not like I've led the conversation with the Generation of Miracles; they were the ones who shared their (our?) anecdotes with me. I was just... sitting there, awkwardly listening to them. Actually, am I really ready for this? I mean- I _just_ got to Japan, and I barely- I slept in a metro station! How in the world am I supposed to deal with _socializing_ with people who already know Kuroko Tetsuya, but not Blue?!

Kagami-kun nods, breaking me out of my thoughts and burning away any hope of running away, and yanks the door open. Sounds flood into the hallway from the people inside.

In the gym (which is small, but extremely clean and well-kept), there were seven people and a dog, six boys, one girl, and what looked to be an Alaskan Malamute. I'd remember because that one time I went to the animal shelter, I'd seriously considered getting one. They were so beautiful and friendly and honest-to-god adorable, and I barely held my composure. But I couldn't, of course, there's no way I'd be able to give that dog a complete meal every day, much less provide for it in every other manner.

"Teppei, you basketball idiot!" a brunette- not quite yelled, but certainly wasn't talking demurely towards the tallest person, a large brown-haired boy, "You can't expect Kuroko to want to play basketball the moment he gets here! You should talk first! Catch up- see what he's been up to!" A dark-haired, glasses-wearing boy nodded from the other side of the- Teppei, his name was Teppei.

"Idiot!" He exclaimed sharply, "Stand up, Koga! Stop rolling around!" There was, in fact, a cat-faced boy- that was Koga, apparently, rolling around on the ground, howling in silent laughter. He was getting pretty red-faced, and I'm pretty sure that's not a good thing. Asphyxiation is a horrible way to go, I've been told.

"Maa, Hyuuga, let the kids kid around while they're still kids!" A plain, black-haired boy smiled and whispered to himself, "That was a nice one!" The Alaskan Malamute yipped in agreement. Both the raven-haired boy's and the Doggo's actions only seemed to make the glasses-wearing boy- Hyuuga, even more aggravated.

"Shut up, Izuki!" He roared. The other boy, Izuki, seemed unaffected by Hyuuga-san's animosity.

"Guys, guys..." a bald boy raised his forearms up and down in a placating gesture, but it was a futile effort, "Maybe we should all take a deep breath and calm down..." The other dark-haired boy waved his arms around without a word. I can only assume that's some form of sign language, because otherwise, I'd just guess he's high or something. It's not a huge shocker for locals in Los Angeles to see a drug-addict loitering the streets in broad daylight.

"Y-yeah!" Koga gasped between his fits of laughter, "Mitobe, t-tell 'em! Bakagami should be coming any minute now!" Mitobe nodded. "Bakagami"... that must be a nickname for Kagami-kun. Being that Kagami-kun's name was plausibly similar, and there should be no one else coming.

Speak of the devil, that was when Kagami-kun decided to announce his presence.

"YO!" Kagami-kun's voice boomed and echoed off the walls, "We're here! Where the hell is everyone else?" The people stopped talking instantly (it was almost remarkable how quickly they cut themselves off) and stared straight at them like a child with their hand caught in the cookie jar. I braced myself for either continued silence or a raving response. Then they exploded with life.

"BAKAGAMI!"

"Arf! Arf!"

Nothing could have prepared me for it. How the fuck were 7 people (and an adorably awesome doggo) so loud? They stormed Kagami-kun, and I deftly moved to the side to avoid being trampled.

The girl (I don't know her name? I'd have thought they'd mentioned her by now) wordlessly squealed with delight. They all clamored around Kagami-kun, their excitement made the air hum with potential energy, and their voices swallowed each other's, talking and talking until their words were incomprehensible. Even Kagami-kun was joining in the symphony.

They were a single unit, a united clan. To an outsider, or someone with less experience, they may sound like a set of discombobulated noises, but I can tell. It's how their voices slot together comfortably, and how they can bump into each other and step on their toes and not have to apologize. Kagami-kun was right; they really were family.

It'd been a while since I'd seen anything like it. People on the streets... they don't take kindly to anyone, even their blood relatives.

It made me mad. That the people on the streets were throwing away their one chance at happiness. When you're on your own, there's no way to get out of that hellhole, unless you were willing to stain your hands and your name. It made me mad that people who had some semblance of hope to raise themselves off their asses refused to when I had to sully myself to bring myself back from the cusp of death by suicide.

"Wait! Where's Kuroko-kun?!" The girl asked, breaking the din, "You said he- was- did he not... show?"

"What- no! He's..." Kagami-kun looked around for me, his and everyone else's confusion growing. Gosh, they were so lost. I should step in, if only out of pity. "I swear, he was right-"

"I'm here," I jumped in, scaring everyone (figuratively) shitless, "I'm right here." If I thought their noise was the most overwhelming thing, then I was dead wrong. Being on the receiving end of their eyes- they had an intensity that sent shivers down my spine, something that's only happened once before in my life (that I know of).

Hazel, green, grey, and brown all scrutinized me; their inspection pinned me down like a butterfly under a microscope. The world held its breath, and suddenly, my throat dries, and I'm choking over myself again. There goes my meticulously made plan.

"Oh my god..."

God, this was... so much worse than I thought it would be. The silence just stretched on and on. I fought to keep my discomfort off my face. This was going to take a while.

"..."

This was a mistake. I never should've agreed with Ash. The silence crushed me and made my stomach perform somersaults like a hormonal teenager. Is it healthy for your stomach to be more acrobatic than you are?

"KUROKO(-KUN)!"

Holy cow. I jumped back at the sudden noise. How in the world was a team that silent become so loud? The others screamed and ran towards me, and the girl encased me in the tightest bear hug I've ever felt, and that's saying something. I've lived through overbearing Asian grandparents who haven't seen their grandchild in years. Trust me, this notwithstanding, nothing- and I mean _nothing_ has anything on Asian-grandparent-hugs. The other surrounded me and screeched like banshees.

"A-ah, I can't... breath!" I gripe, my voice was already raspy from the lack of use, "P-please... let... go!"

"Oh! Sorry!" The girl relinquished her hold on me, and everyone took a step back, thank goodness.

"Wow, you haven't changed a bit, have you?" the girl murmurs. It sounded more like she was talking to herself more than anything, so I politely ignored that statement.

Then her face morphed into something more dark and twisted. It wasn't like the normal _"I'm gonna fuck you over"_ face you can find by walking down the wrong alley, but it was still terrifying in its own right. Like a snarling tiger from the other side of the fence. That was the only warning I got.

It happened just a few seconds after her face changed, but it was lightning quick. It was only thanks to my quick reflexes that I even noticed her hand being raised and lowered at an alarming rate, but I couldn't even do anything to help myself.

_WHACK_

Her hand landed right on the crown of my head and elicited a surprised, _"ite!"_ from me. The blow was more surprising than painful, but the fact that she _hit me at all_ was much more pressing. I don't have any experience with abusive homes, but this... seems like it's toeing the line. What happened to the sense of their familial bond I'd felt earlier? Really? I made eye-contact with Kagami-kun and tried to portray my betrayal.

"Kuroko freaking Tetsuya!" The girl cried through gritted teeth, "What in the- what- where were you?! You've been gone for years! Do you know how hard we looked for you?! AND ONLY NOW YOU POP BACK UP!"

Oh.

There were tears in her eyes. She was crying.

No, not just the girl. The other boys were blinking rapidly as well. Kagami-kun remained dry-eyed, but his face was twisted in a sorrowful grimace.

They _missed_ me. That... Seirin _loved_ me. They wanted me back, but I was gone. The girl continued to rant and rave, and I let her. Ash told me it's a healthy coping mechanism to get your feelings off your chest. But I tried my best not to listen to it.

"Riko, that's enough," Teppei murmured, "I think he gets it." He smiled at me warmly, "Besides, it couldn't have been easy for Kuroko to stay away from his friends for so long; I'm sure he had a reason." It was slightly insulting that Teppei assumed I was friendless, but Seirin probably knows more about Kuroko Tetsuya than I do. Riko took a deep, shuddering breath, but she nodded in the end.

Well, what was I supposed to do in response?

They all looked at me expectantly, and I probably hesitated a touch too long for it to be socially acceptable, but whatever. It's not like I can go back now.

I nervously make eye-contact with Kagami-kun, though I'm not sure what I was hoping for. We're not friends- at least, not anymore (or maybe not yet?); he doesn't have any obligations to help me out any more than he already has. But regardless, Kagami-kun gives a jerky little nod of encouragement. His ruby-red orbs flickered over towards the rest of Seirin. Reminding me that I had to do something.

I looked over everyone's faces, and in that split-second, I remembered that no one here knew who I was. Seirin didn't know about the Blue Phoenix, they didn't know about Ash, and they certainly didn't know about the untimely end to Kuroko Tetsuya. But they cared- they wanted Kuroko Tetsuya back. Even if that could never happen, the least I could do is offer them some closure.

"When I was 15, I got in a plane crash..."


End file.
